12 BEST FUNNIEST SHORT JOKES COLLECTIONS

😂 # The Bad Luck Chuck # 😂

My buddy chuck got arrested by cops on behalf of drug trafficking.

Because of his first offense, he thought he would get off quickly as possible.

But unfortunately, his lawyer was one of the psychopath in the state and he messed up all his case.

So instead of getting a short term, he ended up getting 30 years sentence without parole!!😁😅

Toby is having a bad day,

He tried to button his shirt and the button fell off.

He picked up his briefcase and handle fell off.

He went to open the door and the door-knob fell off.

Now, he is afraid to pee!😁😅

😂 # A Girl In Grocery Store # 😂

A girl entered grocery store and asked the stock boy..,
"You got some nuts?"
The boy said, "No, ma'am."
She again asked, "Well, at least you got any dates?"
So he replied.., 

"Ma'am, if I don't have any nuts, do you really expect me to have a dates..!?"

😂 # A Mechanic's Wife # 😂

Once the bike mechanic's wife was pregnant and she delivered a baby in the hospital.
She then calls her husband and says..,
"Your new born vehicle came out!"
So he replied..,
"With gear or without gear?"😁😅

😂 # Family Guy # 😂

Once a family guy asked Billy..,
Do you know why alcohol is called perfect solvent?
Billy said.., No, why?
The family guy said..,
Because it dissolves marriages, families and careers.
So Billy replied..,
Oh, then it will eventually dissolves you too!

😂 # A Guy Asks God # 😂

A guy asked God, "God, is it true that to you a million years is like a second?"
God said, yes.
The guy said, "God, is it true that to you a million dollars is like a penny?"
God said, yes.
The guy said, "God, can I have a penny?"
God said, "Sure, just a second."😁😅

😂 # A Girl Asks Her Dad # 😂

A girl asked her father a brand new iPhone on her birthday.
So father said..,
"You will get one as long as you get good grades, do your chores, and follow the house rules. Or, you will get a cheaper phone. 

Now tell me, It's my way or the Huawei."

😂 # A Women In The Bus # 😂

A woman gets on a bus with her baby. 

The bus driver says, 

"That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen. Ugh!" 

The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. 

She says to a man next to her, 

"The driver just insulted me!" The man says, 

"You go right up there and tell him off go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

😂 # Vermont Farmer # 😂

Vermont farmer was fixing the fence on his half acre when a Texan rolls by and stops. 

He rolls down the window and says " Hey there, how much land you got here?" Farmer says, "half acre" 

Texan says, 

"Do you know that I can drive my truck all day on my ranch and not even make it half way across?"

😂 # A Man And The Vicar # 😂

A man is playing golf with the vicar. He misses his shot, and yells ‘damn, missed the bugger!’
The vicar tells him ‘if you keep using that language God will throw down a bolt of lightning and strike you dead.’
The man lines up his next shot, and misses again. He says ‘damn, missed the bugger!’
Sure enough, a bolt of lightning comes crashing down. It hits the vicar and strikes him dead.
And God says ‘damn, missed the bugger!’

😂 # Wife Wanted # 😂

A man posted an 'ad' in the Newspaper: "Wife wanted."
Next day, he received nearly a hundred letters which all printed with same..,
"You can have mine."😁😅

😂 # A Snail At The Door # 😂

One day a man inside the house was busy reading his book.

A snail appears at his door, and kept knocking the door.

He opens the door and looks outside, but there was nobody at the door.

But while closing the door.., he suddenly notices a snail on the porch. 

He picks up the snail with anger and throws it as far as he can.

A year later, there was another same knock on the door. 

He opens the door and sees the same snail! 

The snail said.., “What was that all about?!”